In early 2019, I began experiencing sporadic sharp pains around my abdomen. They would last about a minute or so. The stabbing sensation was unpredictable and strong, so much so that I would double-up in pain while clutching at my waist. The first time this happened, I thought I was having an episode of appendicitis because the pain was on my right side. After a lull of several weeks, I was baffled when I experienced the pain on my left side. My mind raced to consider what I had eaten at my last meal. This phenomenon continued for the first half of the year, and I remained puzzled as I could not even see a connection with my menstrual cycle. I rarely suffered from cramps and wondered if this was a ‘menopause thing’.

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The last straw came in early June that year as I climbed The Great Wall of China. I felt traces of the pain all through the climb. I was looking forward to a restful sleep before our travel to India the next day but that night I tossed and turned as the pain did not subside like it had in the past. I eventually took a painkiller and tried to rest in the child pose. Nothing helped. The moment I arrived in New Delhi, I set up an appointment with a doctor who advised me to get an ultrasound of my uterus.

Lo and behold, we could now name the culprit… it was Adenomyosis! The doc informed me that this condition involves the inner lining of the uterus (endometrium) as it grows into the muscular wall of the uterus (myometrium). The exact cause is unknown, and in my case, it was likely related to changing hormones during perimenopause.

I learned that many women with Adenomyosis have no symptoms. However, I finally knew the source of my pain or cramping. I was told that the pain happened on either side because of the alternating active ovary. Treatment for Adenomyosis depends on the severity of the symptoms and options include medications and surgery (hysterectomy). Given that I was in perimenopause, my doc advised me to keep some pain killers handy and count on the eventual shrinking of the uterus to resolve the problem.

I returned to the US and began following a strict protocol of lifestyle regimens around Omni’s pillars of health- seasonal nourishment, personalized movement, deep rest, and meaningful connection. I felt fulfilled in guiding others with the same diagnosis through an Ayurvedic lifestyle to complement their mainstream treatments.

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I shared my diagnosis with my close friends and many in the Omni Wellness community as it helped to explain some new symptoms: breathlessness and bloating. I struggled to keep up during relatively easy hikes and could no longer comfortably practice inversions or forward bends. Fortunately, I did not experience any more pain and I patiently bided my time until menopause.

It has been a humbling journey, especially as I began recording videos for this platform during the peak of my misery. While I learned a lot about Adenomyosis, I learned more about society and its tendency to 'judge'. I found myself educating friends and family (as well as my doctors who advised me to eat less and exercise more). I am grateful for the empathy of all those who ‘understood’.

Eventually, I did not bother to excuse or explain my ‘bloated appearance’ and my ‘exercise abilities’. This, it turns out, was the real learning. Accepting my limitations and yet striving to overcome them through self-love as taught by Ayurveda. I attribute my healing to self-care practices, prime among them being self-massage or abhyanga and positive visualization or yoga nidra.

A year ago, and five years since the onset of symptoms, I began to feel a 'release' which was validated by another diagnostic ultrasound that revealed a naturally shrinking uterus.